TWO DOORS DOWN + MOUNTAIN VETS + THE GREAT

This article was originally published in The Courier on 23rd July 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Two Doors Down – Tuesday, BBC Two, 10pm

Your latest epistle begins with Alan and Michelle arriving at Eric and Beth’s house with a family-sized box of donuts (that’s twelve donuts, apparently; far too many for two people to consume). “A cuppa tea and a donut,” beams Alan, “ye cannae beat it.” 

Dissent ensues when Christine gets involved, as she always must: a low-key agent of chaos attired in dressing gown and slippers. 

We also meet Ash and Iqbal, new neighbours who’ve just arrived from London. They’ve no idea what they’re getting into (not that they’re faultless; Ash is rather snooty and patronising). 

Upon revealing that they work for the NHS, they’re forced to endure a barrage of tactless questions and a smattering of applause.

24 Hours in A&E – Monday, Channel 4, 9pm

As we return to St George’s in London, nurse Emma is called upon to assist a 71-year-old man who’s been brought in after suffering a stroke. While treating him with the utmost care, she tells us about her journey from working in a drycleaners to saving lives whenever possible. 

Meanwhile, 88-year-old Mary is rushed to A&E after falling at home and injuring her head. Mary has led a fascinating life. She shares her stories of a rebellious youth in Bermuda, before returning to the UK to pursue a career in journalism. The odds were stacked against her, but she prevailed. 

Other patients include a nonagenarian widow with an unshakeable commitment to providing for his family. 

Myanmar: The Forgotten Revolution – Monday, Channel 4, 11:05pm

Right now, in the Southeast Asian country of Myanmar, a civil war is raging. 20,000 people have been reported dead. 

At least three major war crimes have been committed by the current Myanmar government, who seized power during a military coup. And yet we never hear about this on the news. Why? 

The latest Dispatches report lays the situation bare in unflinching detail. It questions the entire point of institutions such as the UN, which have failed to help these people in their dire time of need. 

It also follows young armed guerrillas who were once peaceful protesters. They’ve been left with no choice, they have to counter violence with violence. It’s their only hope of liberation.

Mountain Vets – Tuesday, BBC Two, 8pm 

Founded in 1836, the Ulster Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals is the world’s second oldest animal welfare charity. Its brilliant staff face difficult challenges on a daily basis.

 In the latest episode of this touching series, we’re introduced to young vet Allana, who has always wanted to work at the USPCA. She’s living her dream. 

Allana is dealing with a three-legged Lurcher with a heart murmur. Her colleague, Gillian, has a most unusual patient on her hands: a Lionhead goldfish that’s no longer able to swim.

Meanwhile, in a picturesque town located 30 miles away, we visit a much smaller yet no less dedicated veterinary practice. Every week, they treat over 250 pets and livestock.

From – Tuesday, Sky Showcase, 9pm

This new science-fiction/horror series stars Harold Perrineau from Lost as the sheriff of a hellish small town in the remote depths of middle America. Once you arrive in town, you can never leave. Imagine Royston Vasey but without the laughs. 

The series launches with a double-bill in which a family regret taking a detour during a cross-country road trip. Without wishing to give too much away, these unwitting new arrivals gradually discover that they’ve basically entered the Twilight Zone. The town is surrounded by dark, forbidding forests, where terrifying creatures dwell. 

God only knows where it’s all heading, you know what these high-concept shows are like, but the basic conceit is fairly promising. 

The Great – Wednesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Billed as “an occasionally true story”, this period drama plays fast and loose with the facts surrounding Catherine the Great’s rise to power in late 18^th century Russia. 

If you’re willing to accept The Great for what it is – a rather campy satirical comedy-drama with scant interest in historical accuracy – then you may have fun with it. 

Elle Fanning stars as Catherine, an all-powerful Empress who sought to bring enlightenment to her beloved homeland. As season two begins, we find her struggling to come to terms with the fact that perhaps Russia doesn’t want to be ‘free’ after all. 

The cast also includes Gillian Anderson as Catherine’s mother, and Nicholas Hoult as the bitterly dethroned Peter III. 

Commonwealth Games: Opening Ceremony – Thursday, BBC One, 7pm

Steven Knight, who created Peaky Blinders, is one of the key creative directors behind this athletics extravaganza. Naturally, he’s remained tight-lipped about what the ceremony will actually involve, but you can absolutely guarantee that it won’t be a bland affair. 

Something we do know for sure is this: seeing as the event is being held in Birmingham, the ceremony will proudly showcase West Midlands talent and diversity. We’ll also enjoy the traditional Parade of Nations and the grand finale of the Queen’s Baton Relay. 

Those reliable pros Clare Balding, Andrew Cotter and Hazel Irvine are your commentators for the evening. BBC One’s coverage of the games commences at 9:15am on Friday.

THE WITCHFINDER + KATIE PRICE: WHAT HARVEY DID NEXT + OUR HOUSE

This article was originally published in The Courier on 5th March 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

The Witchfinder – Tuesday, BBC Two, 10pm

This promising new sitcom is written and directed by Neil and Rob Gibbons, a sibling duo who, since 2010, have been responsible for some of the greatest ever Alan Partridge material. 

Set in mid-17^th century England against a tumultuous backdrop of civil war, plague and deranged religious zealotry, it stars Tim Key (aka Sidekick Simon) as a hapless witchfinder, Jessica Hynes as his long-suffering assistant, and Daisy May Cooper from This Country as a sardonic woman accused of witchery. 

Python and Blackadder are the obvious touchstones, and there’s no denying that Key’s character – a pompous fool who desperately craves recognition – is in the Partridge mould. But The Witchfinder is still funny on its own farcical terms.

Katie Price: What Harvey Did Next – Monday, BBC One, 9pm

Last year, as you may recall, Katie Price and her teenage son Harvey participated in a tender documentary about their personal circumstances. This is the follow-up. 

Harvey has a complex variety of rare medical and behavioural conditions, which can make life difficult for him. The programme follows Harvey as he embarks upon a major rite of passage: leaving home for college, where he’ll stay for the next three years. Katie and Harvey are understandably anxious, but the brilliant support staff – a credit to their profession – ensure that this transition runs as smoothly as possible. 

It’s a touching portrait of a young man with learning difficulties gradually gaining independence, while a doting mother deals with her own mental health.

Our House – Monday to Thursday, STV, 9pm

Martin Compston and Tuppence Middleton star in this psychological thriller about a divorced couple who make a fragile living arrangement for the sake of their children. And then, of course, it all goes horribly wrong. 

Based on a critically acclaimed bestseller by Louise Candlish, Our House is blighted by stilted dialogue and a faulty narrative structure. The flashbacks are supposed to invite intrigue, but the overall effect is enervating. I only had access to episode one, so for all I know it might reveal tremendous hidden depths by the end. But I doubt it. 

It’s just another instalment in ITV’s never-ending cavalcade of generic kitchen island thrillers. Compston and Middleton do their best, but the material is beyond salvation

Stacey Dooley: Inside the Convent – Monday, BBC One, 10:35pm

Dooley isn’t religious, but for the purposes of her latest investigative report she’s decided to reconsider her belief system while spending ten days in a small convent with some delightful Anglican nuns. 

They observe three key vows: poverty, obedience and celibacy. It’s a strictly-scheduled and repetitive existence, but they all seem happy enough. And it’s not as if they aren’t aware of the sacrifice they’ve made. Some of them admit to having wavered at times, but their faith in God is unstinting. 

Dooley, as always, strikes up a natural rapport with her interviewees. She returns, gently and without judgement, to a central question: how can you have devout faith in a world so beleaguered with cruelty and injustice?

Interior Design Masters with Alan Carr – Wednesday, BBC One, 9pm

A textbook piece of competitive lifestyle television, this returning series pits ten aspiring interior designers against each other. Each week they have to magically transform various commercial spaces while impressing a formidable panel of design gurus including Michelle Ogundehin and Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen. 

The grand prize is a locked-contract with a luxury Cornwall hotel. Meanwhile, host Alan Carr picks up an easy paycheque. 

“I would class myself as a creative genius” boasts a designer who looks like Alan Rickman auditioning for a spaniel-only remake of Easy Rider. The contestants all say things like that, but we know how TV works in this post-Big Brother/Apprentice age. The producers cajole them into sounding as silly as possible.

Michael Mosley: Who Made Britain Fat? – Wednesday, Channel 4, 9pm

As you’ve no doubt surmised from the baldly descriptive title, Britain’s obesity problem is the subject of this new two-part series hosted by genial medical expert Michael Mosley. 

I haven’t seen the programme, previews weren’t available, but it sounds like a rather searching critique of successive governmental failures to effectively tackle the issue, no matter how many supposedly helpful policies they launch. 

Mosley, an unassuming man with a quietly authoritative grasp of well-researched facts, puts forward his own theories with regards to how the crisis can be solved without adding further harm to an already sorely tested NHS. He’s always worth listening to.  In episode one, Mosley’s interviewees include celebrity chef and patently sincere child health campaigner Jamie Oliver.

Grantchester – Friday, STV, 9pm

This ecclesiastical detective drama obviously hasn’t been the same since original star James Norton (TV critic cliché alert) hung up his dog collar, but it’s still a fairly enjoyable clue-sniffing distraction. It whiles away an hour in an entirely inoffensive way. Last of the Summer Crime, if you will. All Murders Great and Small. 

The latest series begins with the discovery of a corpse in the grounds of a struggling ancestral estate. But never mind that, it looks like our intrepid vicar hero could be smitten with a mysterious woman he meets in one of those new-fangled late 1950s jazz clubs. Meanwhile, Geordie (the ever-reliable Robson Green) tries to get back together with his estranged wife.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Peaky Blinders – Sunday 27th February, BBC One

And so, the end is near. As the final series of this stylised Shakespearean gangster tragedy got underway, the untimely passing of the great Helen McCrory was tastefully handled within the first ten minutes. Writer Stephen Knight killed her character off, the dreadful deed unseen for obvious reasons, but she’s not forgotten. Her vital role in this saga endures. 

The huge mainstream success of Peaky Blinders has been rather heartening. It is, after all, a fairly offbeat piece of work. But its unique qualities – that combination of hallucinatory psychodrama, vivid characters, a compelling storyline and a thickly clotted bloodstream of mordant wit – struck a clanging chord with viewers. It will be missed. But for now let’s enjoy its last hurrah.

Stanley Tucci: Searching for Italy – Sunday February 27, BBC Two

The actor Stanely Tucci is elegant charm personified. A dry-witted fellow with a passion for life. So no wonder this new series is an enjoyable confection. What’s not to like about a culinary travelogue in which a charismatic guide celebrates the sights, sounds, tastes and smells of various Italian cities? Superior comfort viewing. 

In episode one, Tucci visited Naples and the Amalfi Coast. It wasn’t an entirely cosy endeavour – Tucci explored the often troubled history of these regions – but his M.O. is basically this: Italy is a wonderful country, it has contributed so much to our cultural palette, and wouldn’t you just love to eat a slice of pizza while admiring some art? Well yes, Stanley, I would. 

TV Review: TABOO + LET IT SHINE

This article was originally published in The Courier on 14 January 2017.

https://www.thecourier.co.uk/fp/lifestyle/entertainment/tv-film/paul-whitelaw-reviews/344742/tv-reviews-taboo-delirious-voodoo-melodrama/

TABOO: Saturday, BBC One

LET IT SHINE: Saturday, BBC Two

Even if TABOO involved heavyweight method growler Tom Hardy playing the word-based guessing game while smashed to the gills on ghastly fruit liqueur, it still wouldn’t be as bonkers as the actual show itself.

Not that I’m complaining. This delirious Gothic melodrama is a hoot.

Set in 1814, it follows rogue ex-soldier turned pirate James Delaney (Hardy) as, far from dead as presumed, he returns from Africa to London for his father’s funeral.

He inherits a disputed piece of land in America, with whom Britain is at war, much to the chagrin of the powerful East India Company, led by Jonathan Pryce swearing like a trouper (His language isn’t anachronistic – according to estimable Horrible Histories expert Greg Jenner, expletives were all the rage in Regency England).   

Revenge is afoot when Delaney discovers that pater was murdered, which exacerbates the typhoon of demonic voodoo voices in his head.

Delaney is a perfect fit for Hardy, which is hardly surprising as he co-created Taboo with his father, the winningly named Chips Hardy, and writer Steven Knight, who devised the similarly violent and stylised Peaky Blinders.

A magnetic actor, Hardy’s natural eccentricity imbues every role he plays. Striding through the filth, macho coat-a-flapping, he revels in Knight’s knowingly ripe, lurid dialogue. Hardy doesn’t chew the scenery in Taboo, he gargles and caresses it.

Sample threat: “You send me twelve men, I will return you twelve sets of testicles in a bag.” I’d quote the rest of that line, but this is a family newspaper.

Imagine an adventure yarn written by a laudanum-addled Robert Louis Stevenson tearing through the Viz Profanisaurus, and you’ve almost imagined Taboo.

It’s stirring stuff, strikingly drawn in visceral charcoals and populated by scarred, craggy faces including such reliable stalwarts as Christopher Fairbank (Moxey from Auf Wiedersehen, Pet) and Scots walnut David Hayman.

Propelled by Hardy’s imposing performance, it moves with the sleekness of a contemporary thriller while exploiting the potential of its wretchedly fascinating period setting.

If it delivers on its promise, then Taboo could rule Saturday nights for the next eight wintry weeks.

In reality, of course, LET IT SHINE will triumph. Mediocrity always does.

Gary Barlow desperately needs to find five young lads for his new Take That-based musical, so thank God the BBC has stepped in to help him via this formulaic talent show.

If I was feeling similarly charitable, I’d dismiss it as a harmless yawn of bland razzle dazzle. But I can’t ignore its role in the inexplicable campaign to promote toadying lickspittle Barlow as an undeserved national treasure.

This is a man so desperate for a knighthood he’d muck out the corgi kennels with his bare hands if that’s what it took. He makes fellow Windsor’s pet Gareth Malone look like Oliver Cromwell.

The programme itself is benign enough – even the ‘losers’ are treated gently – but Saturday night talent shows are in dire need of a rest. Strictly can stay, as it’s always been more of an old-fashioned light entertainment extravaganza, but the rest are more tired than a Barlow solo album.

In an ideal world, this knackered genre would receive a shot in the arm from the likes of ‘Atmosphere!’ in which New Order search for the star of a new Ian Curtis musical, or ‘Bootsy Camp’ starring legendary bass genius Bootsy Collins as he attempts to revive Funkadelic with fresh-faced Italia Conti graduates.

News just in: we don’t live in an ideal world.

TV Review: PEAKY BLINDERS and 24 HOURS IN POLICE CUSTODY

This article was originally published in The Courier on Saturday 4th October 2014.

http://www.thecourier.co.uk/lifestyle

Peaky Blinders: Thursday, BBC Two

24 Hours in Police Custody: Monday, Channel 4

Paul Whitelaw

Deliberately over-stylised and luridly violent, the first series of Peaky Blinders was an entertaining riot of period gangster mayhem. Granted, the dialogue was often rather clunky, but I found I was willing to overlook its flaws and go along for the ride. It was fun and propulsive, with just enough depth to justify its self-conscious swagger.

Can it keep that momentum going over a second series? On the evidence of last week's return, I'm not entirely certain. It may sound odd to describe a drama full of choreographed violence and cold-blooded murder as curiously muted, especially one which began with a pub being blown to pieces, but episode one felt rather hollow and lethargic. Critics immune to the charms of Peaky Blinders have always accused it of being mere style over substance, but in this case the accusations felt valid.

As we returned to 1920s Birmingham, which in the hands of writer Steven Knight is depicted as a hellish furnace at the lawless ends of the Earth, implacable gangster Thomas Shelby was firmly ensconced in his role as the city's leading crime kingpin. His plans for an expansion to London dominated proceedings, to the extent that it appeared to be the only major plot development. Knight spent too long putting his pieces in place at the expense of moving the action forward.

The lengthy, slow-motion scene in which Thomas assassinated someone on behalf of his Irish associates was pure padding, seemingly included because the director couldn't resist matching his eye-catching visuals to the music of Johnny Cash. While the show's anachronistic blues/country score is a vital part of its grungy western aesthetic, scenes such as this make it feel like an elongated music video. The clanking, igneous, soot-drenched production design is stunning, but it should never dominate as much as it did here.

Apparently sculpted entirely from glass, Cillian Murphy continues to thrive on pure charisma as Thomas, but I did find myself impatiently waiting for the much-publicised arrival of the great Tom Hardy. Alas, he was nowhere to be found in episode one, which simply added to the sense of anticlimax.

This stodgy curtain-opener was hopefully just a fleeting wobble, before it returns to form next week. Peaky Blinders is one of our most distinctive TV dramas, so it would be a shame if it ran out of gas so soon.

Produced by the team behind the justly lauded 24 Hours in A&E, 24 Hours in Police Custody is a similarly engrossing observational documentary following the Bedfordshire police force as they attempt to charge their suspects within hours of arrest.

Without an ounce of dubious contrivance, it succeeds in providing the police with the sort of positive publicity they're currently in dire need of. The officers involved came across as decent human beings doggedly in pursuit of justice. Episode one's unlikely star was DC Martin Hart, whose affable approach to interrogation was honed during his time spent working as a holiday rep. Here was an ordinary copper, simply doing his job to the best of his abilities.

His prolonged efforts to charge a man suspected of conspiracy to murder resulted in a simple yet effective hour of television, steeped in tension and humour. There was more drama in the minutiae of this process than you'd find in most scripted police procedurals. Thoughtful, enlightening stuff.

TV Review: PEAKY BLINDERS/THE WIPERS TIMES

This article was originally published in The Courier on 14th September 2013.

http://www.thecourier.co.uk/lifestyle

Peaky Blinders: BBC2, Thursday

The Wipers Times: BBC2, Wednesday

Paul Whitelaw

Having enjoyed episodes two and three of gangster drama Peaky Blinders, I can assure the unconvinced that episode one was little more than an extended trailer for the main feature. So self-conscious was it in its desire to establish an over-stylised aesthetic – essentially an hallucinogenic, rock 'n' roll vision of industrial Birmingham in 1919 – that it forgot to introduce the actual story and characters in a compelling fashion.

Curiously undramatic for something that went out of its way to grab viewers by the throat, it was all flash and no trousers.

The deliberately anachronistic use on the soundtrack of The White Stripes and Nick Cave, whose doom-clanging Red Right Hand functions as a recurring leitmotif, did at least succeed in establishing the desired gangster gothic mood. Set in what looks like the furnace of hell itself, the soot-laden art direction also deserves credit.

But the episode struggled to settle on a comfortable tone, feeling at once like a determined effort to differentiate itself from US dramas such as Deadwood and Boardwalk Empire, to which it's inevitably been compared, and an inferior British cousin of those very shows.

The glacier-eyed Cillian Murphy plays Tommy, a damaged war veteran and leader of a local gang whose silly sobriquet derives from the gleaming razorblades sewn into their caps. After they came into possession of an arsenal of weapons, a barnstorming Belfast copper (Sam Neill) was tasked with recovering them under the orders of Churchill himself.

Chewing his lines like Van Morrison in a particularly foul mood, Neill effortlessly stole his scenes with a hammy performance perfectly in tune with Peaky Blinders' heightened atmosphere. Originally of Irish stock, his Belfast brogue, for which – I kid you not - he received tutelage from Liam Neeson and James Nesbitt, is flawless.

Murphy, meanwhile, is the charismatic calm in the eye of the storm, although his character doesn't really come alive until later. A disappointingly weak link is the usually reliable Helen McCrory as the gang's matriarch. Her terrible accent, which takes a wild tour around the regions every time she opens her gob, is so distracting it's hard to focus on her performance.

While it's refreshing to see a British period drama hurling itself into broad, bold and violent territory, I fear this muddled episode may have put people off. But when it settles down this week, it finally combines its surface sense of the ridiculous with an involving narrative. It's worth sticking with.

Set just a few years earlier, The Wipers Times told the potentially fascinating true story of a satirical magazine written by British soldiers and distributed throughout the trenches during World War One.

Co-written, appropriately enough, by Private Eye editor Ian Hislop, it adopted a wry, witty tone befitting the subject matter. Quipping like a pair of benevolent Blackadders, the frightfully posh officers and mag editors played by Ben Chaplin and Julian Rhind-Tutt were an engaging duo. But the story itself, despite initial promise, petered out long before closing time.

The repetitive encounters between the Wipers team, who printed anonymously for obvious reasons, and an antagonistic officer were a leaden attempt to inject more drama into proceedings. While an effective way of illustrating the magazine's contents, the cutaway sketches used throughout also felt like padding.

Nevertheless, it was a partially effective attempt at blending a 'war is hell' message with an affectionate celebration of an irreverent crew of forgotten morale-boosters.

ONE TO MISS

Father Figure

Wednesday, BBC1, 10:35pm

Written by and starring Irish comedian Jason Byrne, this aggravating family sitcom makes its obvious US antecedent, Home Improvement, look like a challenging piece of avant-garde theatre. Byrne leaves no cliché unturned: the hapless dad; the long-suffering wife; the interfering mother; the slobby best mate; the irritatingly over-confident moppet brats; the straight-laced Christian neighbours dutifully on hand to look aghast whenever Byrne falls over/breaks something. An awkward and predictable marriage of cartoon slapstick, tawdry sight-gags and cosy blandness, it finds itself buried in a graveyard slot for good reason.