SHAUN THE SHEEP: THE FLIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS + GHOSTS + THE AMAZING MR BLUNDEN

This article was originally published in The Courier on 18th December 2021. 

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Shaun the Sheep: The Flight Before Christmas – Christmas Eve, BBC One, 6pm

I never cease to be tickled by the deft comic timing and inventiveness of the Aardman Animations team. At their best they’re right up there with the likes of Tex Avery. High praise indeed, but I reckon they deserve it. 

The latest festive sojourn to Mossy Bottom Farm is typically delightful. When Shaun’s cute little cousin Timmy accidentally hitches a ride on the Proclaimer-esque farmer’s truck, an urgent rescue mission kicks into gear. A busy village market is no place for an innocent lamb. 

I do, however, have a mild complaint: the farmer’s hapless dog really doesn’t deserve the hardship he constantly endures. It’s just not fair and it makes me feel sad. I am 47-years-old.

Two Doors Down – Monday, BBC Two, 9:30pm

As we eavesdrop once again upon these suburban Glasgow neighbours, ‘tis just a few days before Christmas. Prosecco and nibbles abound, although Christine (Elaine C. Smith) opts for a liquid diet of Stella, J.D. and Coke. She’s mourning the recent death of a friend, you see. It’s what she would’ve wanted. 

Christine’s ersatz piety – she’s just returned from church – is a source of mirth throughout. The episode also gets tremendous mileage from the phrase “Pat over the back”, which has an inherently funny rhythm to it, and you may find yourself inspired by a kazoo-based game of Name That Tune. 

As always, nothing and everything happens all at once. A constant muffled soundtrack of Christmas music enhances the unease.

Mandy: We Wish You a Mandy Christmas – Monday, BBC Two, 10pm

Diane Morgan is best known as the gormless cultural commentator Philomena Cunk, who first appeared on Charlie Brooker’s Weekly Wipe. This, however, is Morgan in auteur mode: a pleasingly peculiar sitcom in which she plays a lonely oddball from a high-rise estate. 

I enjoyed series one with reservations; Mandy isn’t hilarious, but I admire Morgan’s commitment to this strange little universe she’s created. And it never outstays its welcome, as each episode is only fifteen-minutes long. 

In the grand tradition of yuletide comedy specials, this is a riff on A Christmas Carol. Raddled performance poet John Cooper Clarke cameos as one of Mandy’s spectral visitors. You rarely see curios like this on TV anymore. I’m glad it exists.

Madame Tussauds: The Full Wax – Wednesday, STV, 9pm

This wry documentary peers behind the curtains of London’s legendary wax museum. At first glance it appears to be quite a glib endeavour, but it gradually unveils a surprisingly potent theme about the transience of fame. 

If a celebrity is no longer considered relevant, their effigy will be banished to a backroom or melted down altogether. And visitors obviously don’t want to be confronted with disgraced celebs a la Savile: Tussauds doesn’t even have a chamber of horrors these days. 

Highlights include the rictus-grinning likeness of Prince Harry being carried around like a deactivated Auton, and the various interjections from cocksure creative director Justin, who comes across as a spectacular wally.

Ghosts – Thursday, BBC One, 8:30pm

The original Horrible Histories team: arguably the most talented British comedy ensemble since The League of Gentlemen? Ghosts is remarkable in that it’s a family-friendly sitcom which neither patronises children nor tips too many knowing winks at their parents. It also combines comedy and pathos in a seemingly effortless way. 

In this Christmas special, a homeless man pitches his tent on the grounds of Button House. Inevitably, the only characters who want to send him packing are the WWI Captain and the trouser-shy Tory MP. But even they become swayed by his plight. That’s not a spoiler, Ghosts is rarely downbeat. 

Special guest-star Jennifer Saunders is entirely at home in this dotty environment.

The Amazing Mr Blunden – Christmas Eve, Sky Showcase, 7pm

Written and directed by Mark Gatiss, this adaptation of Antonia Barber’s supernatural time-travel yarn for children is, without any shadow of a doubt, the best solo venture the League of Gentleman alumnus has undertaken since his first self-penned episode of Doctor Who. He’s in his absolute element here. 

The protagonists are a pair of contemporary teenage kids who find themselves whisked back to a Victorian manor house. The mysterious Mr Blunden (Simon Callow), who arrives on their doorstep just before Christmas, is the catalyst. 

Gatiss, who co-stars alongside Tamsin Greig, pitches the mood perfectly: a strange, cobwebbed dream that won’t frighten children unduly, but it might unsettle them in the best possible sense. 

A Ghost Story for Christmas: The Mezzotint – Christmas Eve, BBC Two, 10:30pm

And if Blunden doesn’t deliver enough Gatiss for your Christmas buck, he’s back again with yet another M.R. James adaptation. Weirdly, he’s never managed to pull these off. 

His child-friendly Blunden adaptation is more atmospheric than any of his ghost stories for adults. They always comes across as functional, churned-out Tales of the Unexpected episodes. This one stars Rory Kinnear as a man who becomes obsessed with a painting of a hooded figure. You can predict the ending from the premise alone. 

It’s not bad as such, but it lacks the genuine eeriness and lingering impact of those classic 1970s adaptations of James’ work. It doesn’t jolt, it merely unfolds. You’ll probably retire to bed with a shrug.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Sting: Reel Stories – Saturday 11th December, BBC Two

When viewed from a certain angle, Sting is the perfect pop star. He’s handsome, talented, ridiculous and pretentious. A borderline brilliant construct. Squint in another direction, however, and he’s just an utter buffoon. 

His enduring appeal lies somewhere in the middle, as this interview with the affably sycophantic Dermot O’Leary confirmed. The Reel Stories format is simple yet effective: musicians are forced to watch old clips of themselves. O’Leary prompts them for a response. That's it, but it's enough.

Sting looked genuinely sad and occasionally amused while watching footage of The Police in their imperial phase, but he couldn’t quite manage to poke fun at himself. His underlying pomposity was palpable. If only he could loosen up a bit, we might all like him more. Some advice for Sting, there.

 

 

WALKING WITH... JIM MOIR + DAVID BADDIEL: SOCIAL MEDIA, ANGER AND US + YOU DON'T KNOW ME

This article was originally published in The Courier on 11th December 2021.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Walking with... Jim Moir – Friday, BBC Two, 7:30pm

The latest episode of this immersive hike-fest stars the artist occasionally known as Vic Reeves (a pseudonym he tends to reserve for his collaborations with Bob Mortimer). Armed with a 360-degree camera, Moir guides us along the Strait of Dover on the Kent coast. 

Gentle highlights include encounters with some bee farmers and a man digging for lugworms. He also travels on a miniature steam train, and quite rightly marvels at the area’s exquisite combination of natural beauty and brutalist architecture. 

Moir is reliably eccentric and charming throughout. “Looking at things is the best thing ever,” he enthuses. “They should probably teach looking as a lesson at school… because people don’t look as much as they should.”

David Baddiel: Social Media, Anger and Us – Monday, BBC Two, 9pm

Or: ‘Social Media, Anger and My Media Chums’. In this well-meaning yet muddled documentary, comedian and self-confessed Twitter addict David Baddiel declares that social media is “fuelling a divisive culture of outrage, hatred and anger.” 

It’s true that social media often bring out the worst in people. Online abuse is a serious problem. The likes of Facebook and Twitter are notoriously lax and inconsistent when it comes to regulating offensive comments. But Baddiel’s essay, which inevitably includes a windy discussion about ‘cancel culture’, fails to tackle these issues in any great depth. 

He concludes by stating the obvious point that people should be nicer to each other. Well, yes. And? A peculiar programme.

Jamie: Together at Christmas – Monday, Channel 4, 8pm

Welcome one and all to Jamie Oliver’s funny farmstead kitchen, as he once again insists upon cooking some “epic dishes” for your mouth-watering pleasure. 

“This is about saying ‘I love you’ through food,” he gushes, with all the professionally sentimental earnestness he can muster. I don’t actually mind Jamie, he’s an embarrassing yet mostly harmless fool. Maybe I’m getting soft in my old age. 

During the latest chapter of his never-ending story, he pretends to host a lavish Christmas dinner for family and friends. The menu includes beef bourguignon, garlic bread stuffed with parsley, and a frozen dessert conjured with assistance from one of his children. 

Oh, and the pandemic is all over apparently. That’s the cheering takeaway message.

Strictly The Real Full Monty – Monday and Tuesday, STV, 9pm

An annual fixture on ITV, The Real Full Monty aims to raise awareness of breast cancer and testicular cancer. It encourages viewers to check for lumps; an important message conveyed through the cheeky prism of celebrities performing a choreographed striptease routine. That may sound crass, but it’s an effective piece of socially responsible light entertainment. 

This year, as that clumsy title indicates, the contestants are coupled up with dancing partners. Among those sharing their wares are athlete Colin Jackson, Duncan James from Blue, EastEnders actor Laila ‘Big Mo’ Morse, and Martin Roberts from Homes Under the Hammer. They all have personal reasons for participating. Emotional scenes ensue. 

Once again, your friendly host and mentor is Ashley Banjo.

The Dog House at Christmas – Thursday, Channel 4, 8pm

There’s an even higher cuteness quotient than usual in this festive edition of The Dog House. After all, are there any here among us who don’t enjoy seeing dogs wearing Christmas jumpers? 

December is a particularly busy time of year at Wood Green Animal Shelters, but the staff, as always, are on hand to match prospective owners with dogs in need of rehoming. 

This week’s centrepiece involves a human mother of two who is going through a divorce after 22 years of marriage. She hopes that adding a dog to the family might restore some happiness to their home. Enter Michael, a young lurcher cross-terrier who was found wandering stray. We also meet Clarence the one-eyed dachshund.

One Night in Alton Towers – Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm

The basic gist of this new series: comedians Alex Brooker and Josh Widdicombe roam around some of Britain’s most notable attractions after dark. 

I haven’t seen episode one – preview copies were held up in pre-Christmas traffic – but the press blurb suggests they’re being monitored by fixed-rig cameras and a remotely-stationed production team who won’t interfere unless someone looks to be in actual danger. 

So that could be enjoyable, although probably not quite as funny as the time Alan Partridge found himself locked in a warehouse for an entire weekend. The image of him mummified in bubble wrap haunts me still. 

Brooker and Widdicombe’s first guest is fellow comedian Roisin Conaty.

I Literally Just Told You – Thursday, Channel 4, 10pm

This new gameshow pivots around a simple yet novel and vaguely post-modern concept: most of the questions are written as the show unfolds. 

They’re based on things that have been said and seen throughout, so the contestants have to keep their wits about them. Everything is a potential answer. It’s a fun format, the whole thing works a treat. 

Host Jimmy Carr wisely jettisons his aloof and caustic stage persona, so much so that he actually comes across as quite warm. The contestants are sometimes ribbed gently, but never unkindly. 

You can tell he’s enjoying being in charge of a show that one of his heroes, the great Bob Monkhouse, would surely have approved of.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Superman & Lois – Saturday 4th December, BBC One

Yet another retelling of the Superman legend, this one finds Clark Kent happily married to Lois Lane. They have two teenage sons, one of whom has social anxiety disorder. 

It’s essentially a domestic drama in which Superman has to save the world while dealing with his problems at home. And it sort of works. The tone is affectionate and rather charmingly earnest, albeit leavened with flashes of dry humour. 

Scheduling it in an early Saturday evening slot, just like 1990s hit Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman, is a nice idea in theory, but it doesn't make much sense as the show won’t appeal to young kids. There’s not enough superhero action, and children don’t tend to be interested in conversations about mortgage loans.

You Don’t Know Me – Sunday 5th December and Monday 6th December, BBC One

This four-part thriller is a stark, riveting, thought-provoking piece. It began as most courtroom dramas end: with the accused on trial and about to receive their sentence. 

Hero (an impressive turn from Samuel Adewunmi) is a young black man who insists that he didn’t murder a local drug dealer. Having decided to defend himself, he confronts the jury/viewers with the uncomfortable truth of his story. 

A contrived dramatic device, sure, but the dialogue and performances are authentic. 

Based on a book by criminal defence lawyer Imran Mahmood, it subverts expectations, embraces moral grey areas and forces us to care about its characters and their nightmarish predicament. One of 2021’s best TV dramas.

 

TALENT + TWO DOORS DOWN + DOCTOR WHO

This article was originally published in The Courier on 4th December 2021.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Talent – Tuesday, BBC Scotland, 10pm

This charming documentary peers behind the scenes of a Scottish talent agency run by one Sonia Scott Mackay. A documentarian’s dream, Sonia is colourful, tenacious and utterly dedicated to her eclectic roster of clients. 

The programme focuses on four of them: a paramedic and mother of four who has recently broken into acting; an all-rounder (he’s in a Steps tribute act among other things) who’s had a tough time of late; a charismatic chap with a chance of appearing as an extra in a major Hollywood film; and a young actor/model who has experienced prejudice due to her disabilities. 

They’re all lovely people. And while their stories are sometimes poignant, the overall tone is celebratory.

Two Doors Down – Monday, BBC Two, 10pm

Series five of this deservedly popular BBC Scotland sitcom only runs to a mere three episodes. But it’s always a pleasure spending time with these discomfited suburban neighbours. 

In episode one they gather for champagne and curry. While Christine (Elaine C. Smith) struggles with an upset stomach, Ian reveals that he was recently beaten up by some thugs; but that’s nothing compared to the consternation that ensues when his partner Gordon refrains from drinking alcohol. 

As always, writers Simon Carlyle and Gregor Sharp bless their exceptional cast with sharply observed material. Two Doors Down has earned its place on the sofa alongside great single-setting sitcoms such as The Royle Family and Friday Night Dinner.

The Cult of Conspiracy: QAnon – Tuesday, Channel 4, 9pm

The American far-right movement QAnon revolves around one of the most bizarre conspiracy theories of recent years. The details are too sordid to divulge in a family newspaper, but suffice to say these people are members of a deluded cult who believe that sinister forces were conspiring against Donald Trump during his time in office. As if he needed any help in torpedoing his presidency. 

This documentary from journalist Ben Zand spends time with some of QAnon’s most devout believers, in an attempt to understand them on a human level. What led them down this convoluted path of outlandish lies? Louis Theroux will presumably be narked that Zand arrived at this grimly fascinating subject before him.

Nadiya’s Fast Flavours – Thursday, BBC Two, 8:30pm

Nadiya Hussein’s latest culinary odyssey is all about experimenting with flavour in a relatively simple way. 

A sprightly wizard at play in her spacious pastel-coloured kitchen, this week she bakes a loaf of banana bread with salted caramel sauce and a sprinkling of thyme; sculpts some sky-scraping Bombay burgers; serves a platter of sweet and spicy chicken bites; and unveils her very own apple and dumpling pie. “The ultimate put your feet up pie,” she enthuses. Which is a rather pleasing arrangement of words, isn’t it? 

‘Perfect lifestyle’ programmes such as this can often be quite vexing, but Hussein keeps annoyance at bay with her natural sunny charm. She’s a nicely unpretentious host.

And Just Like That… – Thursday, Sky Showcase, 9pm

All we really know about this sequel to Sex and the City is that Sarah Jessica Parker, Kristin Davis and Cynthia Nixon are reprising their roles. Kim Cattrall has declined to take part, for reasons she’s discreetly kept to herself. And they’re none of our business, frankly. 

She’ll be missed, but if these ten half-hour episodes somehow manages to recapture everything that was good about the show before it became a parody of itself, then the whole thing will be worth it. 

Revivals rarely work, but exceptions aren't unheard of. And surely it can’t be worse than the widely reviled Sex and the City 2? That’s not humanly possible. The series begins with a double-bill.

Grayson’s Art Club: An Exhibition for Britain – Friday, Channel 4, 8pm

Grayson Perry and his wife Philippa are an always welcome presence on our screens, they’re a united force for good. In this one-off instalment of their egalitarian series, the Perrys curate an exhibition displaying artworks created during lockdown. 

Earlier this year, they received more than 17,000 submissions from members of the public, as well as pieces created by professional artists and various celebrities (their guests include Boy George and Johnny Vegas). 

The exhibition opens in Bristol on 4^th December, hence why the programme is still being edited as I write these words on 28^th November, but I can pretty much guarantee that it will be worth your time. Grayson’s Art Club is a quietly life-affirming project.

Vienna Blood – Friday, BBC Two, 9pm

Set in early 1900s Vienna, this pulp melodrama unfolds at times like a fever dream. That’s a compliment of sorts. Matthew Beard stars as Dr Max Liebermann, a Sigmund Freud acolyte who assists the police with their inquiries. 

Series two begins with the death of an elderly Hungarian countess, who has seemingly drowned in her bath. The police assume that she took her own life. Naturally, there’s more to the case than that. The deceased was one of Liebermann’s patients, but he can’t betray her trust. At least not at first. 

Vienna Blood is written by Stephen Thompson, whose credits include Doctor Who and Sherlock, which might give you some idea of the slightly heightened tone.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Freddie Mercury: The Final Act – Saturday 27th November, BBC Two

Freddie Mercury has been the subject of numerous documentaries since his untimely death from AIDS in 1991, but this excellent 90-minute endeavour wasn’t just about His Majesty. 

A sensitive chronicle of Freddie’s tragic final years, the film also examined the widespread panic and ‘gay plague’ hysteria surrounding HIV. Like Sky’s recent series Positive, it served as a blunt reminder of the vile homophobia that was once served up every day during public discourse on this issue. 

A case in point: some appalling archive footage of MP David Blunkett describing Freddie’s lifestyle as “bizarre… and quite unacceptable.” This, remember, was only 30 years ago. No wonder Roger Taylor couldn’t hide his anger. 

Doctor Who – Sunday 28th November, BBC One

Fair play to divisive showrunner Chris Chibnall, this truncated serial is clearly the best thing he’s written for Doctor Who. Many flaws and all, it’s been quite enjoyable in a superficial way. 

So even if Sunday’s finale collapses in on itself (a very real possibility), the journey was diverting for the most part. The penultimate episode even featured a comic scene with jokes which actually landed.

And Jodie Whittaker, who’s been sadly ill-served during her tenure, has to her credit usually managed to rise above the material she’s been lumbered with. 

She’s been particularly good and ‘properly’ Doctorish during this almost valedictory run. It’s as if Chibnall has finally worked out how to write for her. Better late than never I suppose.