SHETLAND | STORYVILLE: GORBACHEV. HEAVEN | HOW TO WITH JOHN WILSON

This article was originally published in The Courier on 10th September 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Shetland – Wednesday, BBC One, 9pm

Time now for D.I. Jimmy Perez to bid adieu to TV’s most incident-packed Scottish archipelago. His final case, which began with a missing teenager and ended up with a radicalised local setting off bombs all over the principality, proved to be a decent send-off for the character. 

Perez will never be regarded as one of the greatest ever made-up crime-solvers - he was no Columbo, Fitz or Tennison – but his quiet, hangdog integrity and compassion were appealing traits. Douglas Henshall, a sensitive actor, was perfectly cast in the role. 

As you’d expect, the finale consists of a series of terse windswept confrontations and dramatic revelations. Plus the denouement is rather poignant.

Deepfake Porn: Could You Be Next? – Tuesday, BBC Three, 10pm

Deepfake technology is an increasingly sophisticated form of digital manipulation whereby images of people can be convincingly placed in an entirely different context. In this troubling documentary, presenter Jess Davies talks to three deepfake victims. 

These non-consenting women suffered severe trauma when they were made aware of graphic mocked-up pornographic footage of themselves online. Davies reveals that there is no official legislation to protect victims of this devastating crime in England and Wales. There is nothing they can do. 

She also encounters deepfake creators who, without any fear of legal action hanging over their heads, have no qualms about continuing with this abuse.

Storyville: Gorbachev. Heaven – Tuesday, BBC Four, 9pm

Originally released via iPlayer on 31^st August, purely by chance just a few hours after its subject’s death was announced, this intimate documentary about Mikhail Gorbachev is being swiftly repeated for obvious reasons. 

Filmed towards the end of his life, it shadows the frail former Soviet leader as he reflects upon his controversial legacy. Hailed by many in the west as a hero for his role in ending the Cold War – Gorbachev was the architect of Glasnost and Perestroika – he’s reviled by many in his homeland for destroying the Soviet Union. His policies had, to say the least, long-lasting consequences. 

The film doesn’t ask us to feel sorry for Gorbachev, but he cuts a rather sad and lonely figure.

The Great British Bake Off – Tuesday, Channel 4, 8pm

The latest series of this sugar-coated juggernaut begins, as it always must, with Cake Week. 

A fresh batch of contestants are tasked with producing 12 perfect mini cakes, a sumptuous sponge cake, and a mercifully scaled-down dessert facsimile of a home close to their hearts. Preview copies weren’t available, but this will obviously be business as usual. The Bake Off format takes care of itself, it needn’t ever change. 

The main event is accompanied on Friday at 8pm by The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice, in which host Jo Brand and various celebrity chums cast – oh yes – a sideways glance at the week’s events. We also check in with the first ejected contestant.

Nadiya’s Everyday Baking – Wednesday, BBC Two, 8:30pm

If you weren’t fully sated by Bake Off’s return, then here’s the delightful Nadiya Hussein with more kitchen tips. 

Her latest series is based around a simple mission statement: “baking for you, for me, and for the people we love.” Yes, it’s basically just your standard ‘busy parent’ cookery show - life hacks you can activate before that stressful school run! - but you’d really have to go out of your way to be pointlessly annoyed by it. 

Nigella’s programmes, which revolve around the same premise, are admittedly more compelling because she has such a bizarre presentation style. They’re inadvertently funny parodies of an upper middle-class fantasia. Hussein is far more down to earth and relatable.

My Grandparents’ War – Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm

A wartime-focused version of BBC One’s Who Do You Think You Are?, this returning series follows various celebs as they find out more about the roles their ancestors played during World War One and World War Two. 

The second series begins with Game of Thrones actor Kit Harington, whose grandfather served alongside James Bond creator Ian Fleming in Naval Intelligence. He was subsequently recruited by MI5 and MI6, and went on to commandeer one of the most notorious spying operations of the 20^th century. Another one of grandad Harington’s colleagues? Kim Philby. 

Young master Harington also uncovers a tragic romance. This, clearly, is not your standard family backstory. An eventful panoply of riches, no less.

LAST WEEK’S TV

How To with John Wilson – Sunday 4th September, BBC Two

This comic documentary series provides proof, if proof be needed, that irony and sincerity aren’t mutually exclusive. It’s an utterly charming confection in which the American filmmaker John Wilson provides gentle tutorials on how to get through life. 

Wilson is a sweet-natured nerd with a nice line in droll understatement. He wanders his homeland in pursuit of people and their stories. Some of Wilson's interviewees are rather unusual, but he never mocks them. He's genuinely interested in what they have to say.

Episode one, which initially presented itself as an amusing treatise on the art of small talk, ended up being an affecting study of anxiety, loneliness and grief. A very special little show with a generous spirit, I can’t recommend it enough.

MARTIN COMPSTON'S SCOTTISH FLING | DOC MARTIN | RIDLEY

This article was originally published in The Courier on 3rd September 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Martin Compston’s Scottish Fling – Thursday, BBC Scotland, 10pm and Friday, BBC Two, 9:30pm

The Line of Duty actor positively swells with national pride during this perfectly pleasant scenic travelogue. He reacquaints himself with Scotland in the company of his pal, the TV presenter Phil MacHugh. They’re an affable duo. 

The series begins on the West Coast, where Compston is from. In Dunoon they shoot the cheerfully innuendo-laden breeze (and play crazy golf) with RuPaul’s Drag Race UK winner Lawrence Chaney. 

Later on, they climb a hill with Zahrah Mahmood, who’s made a name for herself on Instagram as The Hillwalking Hijabi. Their view from the summit is stunning. “You know how a lot of people say the great outdoors are their church?” she smiles, “I feel like this is my mosque.”

Inside Central Station – Monday, BBC One, 8pm

The latest series of this observational doc about Glasgow’s Central Station heralds some major changes for staff and passengers alike. 

We follow engineers as they deal with one of the biggest renovations the Argyll line has ever seen. This project necessitates the temporary closure of Glasgow Central’s low level station, which serves over five million passengers every year. 

Despite all of this stress and upheaval, everyone appears to take it in their stride. There’s no point complaining about minor inconveniences, especially when they’ll ultimately lead to improvements. Wise words, I know. 

Inside Central Station is a genial show, a modest little masterclass in how to compile a workplace documentary. It’s full of low-key character and charm.

24 Hours in A&E – Monday, Channel 4, 9pm

The 28^th series of 24 Hours in A&E was filmed at St George’s Hospital in London during the lockdown autumn of 2020. It begins with Sara, who’s been rushed to A&E after collapsing at work. The doctors are concerned that she may have a bleed on the brain. 

Meanwhile, teenager Flynn hits a car while riding his bike, and Jane – who visits A&E with a severe headache – reflects upon her childhood spent in Zambia and Lancashire. 

As always, it’s a reliably tender compendium of human interest stories. The formula never changes, because it doesn’t need to. Our innate empathy connects us with these people. It could be you, me, or any of our loved ones in those hospital beds.

First Dates Hotel – Tuesday, Channel 4, 9pm

Another year, another spin-off series in which maître d’ Fred Sirieix and his matchmaking squad usher yet another group of hopefuls into their exotic luxury love shack. 

Ex-military paramedic Gareth has pretty much given up on the hope of ever meeting anyone. Gareth, having applied to appear on First Dates, obviously wasn’t expecting the producers to match him up with a theoretically perfect partner. 

The twist in this particular story – First Dates doesn’t half love its twists – is that Gareth and his date, Carys, once chatted with each other on a dating app. But they never took things any further than that. 

We also meet a retired taxidermist embarking upon her first date in 39 years.

Doc Martin – Wednesday, STV, 9pm

Martin Clunes has been playing TV’s most beloved Cornwall-based grumpy medic on and off for eighteen years. And now it’s time for him to say farewell to the character. 

The final series begins with our hero in self-imposed retirement, a decision he’s clearly starting to regret. Your special guest star is Fay Ripley, who plays a woman struggling with a stressful divorce. 

Doc Martin lasted so long for several very good and straightforward reasons: well-written scripts, lovely scenery and likeable characters brought to life by a solid cast, a cast spearheaded by Clunes exuding his uniquely lugubrious charisma. 

A warm, droll comedy drama with popular appeal, it achieved everything it ever set out to do.

Katie Price: Trauma and Me – Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm

Last year, Katie Price experienced PTSD following a car accident. In this documentary, she talks about her ongoing mental health struggles. 

The programme wasn’t available in time for my deadline, but I’m flagging it up because Price is a very candid and thoughtful person. The documentaries she’s fronted in recent years have always been worthwhile. This one features contributions from Price’s parents, who express understandable concern about their daughter’s wellbeing. 

Price, as always, interviews and listens to people who are experiencing similar problems. They discuss the various triggers that can cause them to spiral, while highlighting the ways in which we can help ourselves and each other. 

I predict with some confidence that it will all be handled sensitively.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Ridley – Sunday 28th August, STV

I’m still not entirely convinced that this new crime drama starring Adrian Dunbar isn’t a masterfully deadpan post-modern parody of every cliché in the Sad Cop Bingo playbook. 

He plays former DI Alex Ridley, who recently lost his wife and daughter in an arson attack. Naturally, Ridley lives alone in a big expensive house on the banks of a picturesque lake while listening to mournful jazz records. 

His replacement on the force, a former protégé, entices the great Ridley out of retirement to help her solve some mystifying cases. Perhaps that will give him a new lease of life? 

I mean, really. Come on. Dunbar, a fine actor, deserves better than this. So do we. 

The Capture – Sunday 28th August and Monday 29th August, BBC One

It’s been three years since series one of this superior conspiracy thriller – its return was presumably delayed by the pandemic – hence why series two began with a very lengthy recap. That wasn’t necessary, as it revolves around a new case for counter terrorism agent Rachel Carey (Holliday Grainger). 

Newcomers to the show would have experienced no problems following the action; the opening scene clearly established that the villains of the piece are capable of corrupting CCTV footage using sophisticated deepfake technology. The framed victim in this case is an up-and-coming government minister with ties to China. 

The Capture is a slick, smart confection that actually has something to say about real-world concerns surrounding data protection and surveillance.

The Suspect | Blackpool's Dance Fever | Animal Airlift: Escaping the Taliban

This article was originally published in The Courier on 27 August 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

The Suspect – Monday, STV, 9pm

Joe O’Loughlin (Aidan ‘Poldark’ Turner) is a reputable psychologist who’s recently been diagnosed with Parkinson’s. 

Joe becomes a national hero when he stops a young terminal cancer patient from jumping off a high window ledge. He’s also researching a book about attitudes towards sex workers, so when a young sex worker – her identity unknown – is brutally murdered, the police call him in to profile her. A series of weird coincidences – or are they? – ensue. 

On the evidence of episode one, The Suspect is more intelligent and sensitive than your standard TV crime drama. It appears to have some depth. 

Turner is a charismatic actor, but the subtly scene-stealing star is Shaun Parkes as our weary chief investigating officer.

Blackpool’s Dance Fever – Monday, BBC One, 8pm

Blackpool, as every devoted Strictly fan knows, is the universal heartland of ballroom dancing. Why? Well, for almost 100 years, the Blackpool Dance Festival has attracted hoofing contenders from all around the world. It’s an institution, albeit one which has never quite received the widespread attention it deserves. This amiable documentary delves behind its sequined scenes. 

The dancers have various personal stories to tell, they’ve tangoed and strived from all walks of life. Taking part in this event means the world to them. 

It’s also a tribute to those beautiful Blackpool ballrooms, the Winter Gardens and the Tower. I’m not one for sentimentality (I am one for sentimentality), but they’re absolute works of art.

Fastest Finger First – Monday to Friday, STV, 4:30pm and 4pm

There are few things I enjoy more in life than utterly trivial pursuits. So this new weekday afternoon quiz show, which I’m afraid I haven’t seen, sounds like something I’ll enjoy. 

If you’re anything like me – and God knows, I wouldn’t wish that on anyone – you’ll probably be intrigued by the sound of it too. A spin-off from Who Wants to Be A Millionaire, it presents us with various contestants who, should they triumph in this scenario, will secure a guaranteed place on the mothership. A gangplank leading up to one actual million pounds. 

It’s basically a prequel expansion of the first Millionaire round we’re all so familiar with. Your host is Anita Rani.

Jamie’s One-Pan Wonders – Monday, Channel 4, 8:30pm

This week, your friendly neighbourhood millionaire chef whips up some smoky noodle soup, a pan of home-made bread, and a chicken ‘n mushroom pie. 

The whole point of this particular Oliver vehicle is how simple yet delicious his dishes are. These easy to follow recipes won’t take up much of your valuable time either, they can – as per the show’s simply descriptive title – be cooked in just one pan. 

I don’t mind Jamie Oliver, and I’m sure he’d be delighted to hear that. Yes, he’s a rather silly person, but he’s harmless. And he has at least used his magical powers to effect some positive social change, the fella’s heart is in the right place.

Animal Airlift: Escaping the Taliban – Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

Last August, during the West’s utterly chaotic withdrawal from Afghanistan, the former Royal Marines commando Pen Farthing worked around the clock to ensure the safe evacuation of his charitable organisation’s Afghan staff and the animals they shelter. 

The sad images released by Farthing and his team mobilised support from the animal-loving British public. Boris Johnson officially declared his approval. But portions of the British media turned on Farthing when he left a deeply frustrated, angry voicemail for an aide to the Secretary of Defence. He was accused of prioritising pets before people. 

This probing documentary examines the ways in which the widespread perception of a public figure can turn on a dime when politics are weaponised.

999: On the Frontline – Trauma – Monday, Channel 4, 11:05pm

The West Midlands Ambulance Service deal with major trauma cases on an arduous daily basis. In this thematically-linked episode of the stalwart observational documentary series, we follow paramedics in the thick of it all. 

They come to the aid of a woman whose newly born child is experiencing severe breathing difficulties, an 87-year-old man who has fallen off a ladder and damaged his pelvis, and a teenager who was, to say the least, lucky to survive a freak horsing accident. 

I sometimes complain about the hollow voyeuristic nature of programmes in this ‘Oh the humanity!’ genre, and I’ll never be entirely comfortable with them, but 999 does at least boast some semblance of integrity.

Grand Designs – Wednesday, Channel 4, 9pm

After all these years of dealing with sometimes ludicrously unrealistic building projects, you’d think that Kevin McCloud would be a broken man. But no, he’s still somehow managed to retain his wryly sceptical yet fundamentally sympathetic persona. He’s a hero of sorts, a better man than I. 

The umpteenth series of Grand Designs begins with a curved glass family home plonked into the middle of a Manchester suburb. Colin, a man possessed of undeniable ambition, wants to make his dream abode look like it’s floating. 

This doesn’t go down well with his rather more pragmatic Swedish architect, Italian interior designers, and Latvian building company. But – hey! – maybe Colin is a kind of maverick visionary.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Investigating Diana: Death in Paris – Sunday 21 August and Monday 22 August, Channel 4

There are so many conspiracy theories surrounding the death of Princess Diana, hence why there have been so many television programmes made about the death of Princess Diana. 

This series, which concludes on the 28^th and 29^th of August, is just another cog in an ever-revolving wheel. It doesn’t reveal any new information, because of course it doesn’t. Diana’s death was a tragedy, that’s all we can say with any certainty. Anything else is pure speculation. 

Which isn’t to suggest that we should just forget about the whole thing, far from it, but programmes such as this add up to very little. That said, I haven’t seen the last two episodes. Maybe they’ll sort it all out.

Saving Lives at Sea – Thursday 25 August, BBC Two

Imagine if your job involved rescuing people in distress. Perhaps it does, in which case I sincerely doff my cap to you. I’m writing this on a Sunday evening with a cat on my lap while eating a packet of Monster Munch; I have contributed nothing to society and the wellbeing of others. 

Saving Lives at Sea, which returned last week, is a humbling endeavour. Yes, we’ve all seen shows of this nature a thousand times before, but familiarity in this case doesn’t breed contempt. 

Equipped with their own cameras for maximum spume-sprayed drama, these unassuming rescuers set about their business with the utmost professionalism. Lives were saved. It’s just what they do. Someone has to.

LION: THE RISE AND FALL OF THE MARSH PRIDE + FIGHT AT THE FORT + MARRIAGE

This article was originally published in The Courier on 20th August 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Lion: The Rise and Fall of the Marsh Pride – Tuesday, BBC Two, 9pm

Africa’s Marsh Pride of lions have been closely documented over the last 40 years, most notably by the BBC’s world-renowned Natural History Unit. In this engrossing 90 minute documentary, the team reconvenes with a species facing extinction. 

It’s a tragedy writ large. Over half of Africa’s lions have been wiped out during the last few decades. There are only around 20,000 left in the wild. They’re desperate, depleted, a dying breed. 

The film features contributions from Maasai people who have to protect their livestock from these hungry predators. They have no other options, what else can they do? 

The epic narrative is embellished by footage culled from the BBC’s vast archive. An exceptional piece of work.

The Dark Side of Direct Sales – Tuesday, BBC Three, 8pm

Young people around the UK are being exploited and conned by direct selling firms. They’ve been enticed by entry-level riches, but in reality they’re rewarded with nothing at all. This documentary exposes what it’s really like to work for these disingenuous cowboys. 

The grim details, most of which are revealed by former agents, include a denial of toilet breaks and several other cruel forfeits. 

I take my imaginary hat off to BBC Three, a ‘youth’ channel that was once quite rightly derided for its facile content. Those days are long gone. In recent years, it’s cleaned up its act. Your friends at Three are more or less defined by worthwhile programmes such as this. Actual public service broadcasting.

Fight at the Fort – Tuesday, BBC Scotland, 10pm

Shadab Iftikhar is Britain’s only Asian football manager. He’s in charge of Fort William F.C., a Scottish Highlands team who haven’t won a league game in over two years. 

At the start of the 2022 football season, the Highland League – the fifth tier of Scottish football - introduced a controversial new diktat: from now on, the bottom-placed team will face relegation. Fort William have lurked at the bottom of their league for the past five years. 

This documentary follows Iftikhar as he does everything in his power to reverse their fortunes. He’s a charismatic fella who was born to manage football teams. It’s his calling. You don’t need to be a football fan to enjoy this bittersweet saga.

Rosie Jones’ Trip Hazard – Tuesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Series two of this amiable confection begins with our host, the comedian Rosie Jones, visiting the north-eastern Scottish heartland of Moray. 

The gist of the show can (and will) be summed up thus: Jones embarks upon various adventures each week while accompanied by a famous pal. Her latest companion is TV presenter AJ Odudu. 

Together they climb Cairn Gorm, one of the highest mountains in Britain. They also enter a clay pigeon shooting competition, row across a loch, dabble in pottery, and try to find some inner peace at Moray’s idyllic environmentally-friendly retreat, Findhorn Ecovillage. And after all of that, they inevitably sample some whisky. 

Your narrator is fellow travelogue doyen, Dame Joanna Lumley.

The Accused: National Treasures on Trial – Wednesday, Channel 4, 9pm

Operation Yewtree was set up in the wake of the posthumous revelations about Jimmy Savile, one of Britain’s most prolific sex offenders. Most of the celebrities who received a firm knock on the door were guilty as charged. But some of them weren’t. 

This programme, which wasn’t available for preview, features testimonies from three famous people who were accused but never arrested or convicted: Cliff Richard, Paul Gambaccini and Neil Fox. 

I quote now from the official synopsis: “It asks the difficult but important questions about how we balance the rights and freedoms of the famous with the need to deliver justice to victims of heinous crimes.” We can only hope that the whole thing is handled sensitively.

All That Glitters – Thursday, BBC Two, 9pm

Comedian Katherine Ryan returns for another mildly diverting sojourn into the world of hand-crafted jewellery. All That Glitters is ostensibly a celebration of wildfire creativity, but the format of the show itself is utterly formulaic. 

Our contestants have to prove their everlasting worth in a designated ‘workshop’ overseen by judges. You’ve seen it all before, folks, and you’ll see it all again. 

Nevertheless, the trinkets meticulously crafted by these people are rather fetching and inventive. And that, I suppose, is why we idly settle upon programmes such as this. The participants are talented, they’re nice, bright, interesting artists who manage to rise above their bland surroundings. 

Plus, y’know, who doesn’t like looking at glittery stuff?

Aretha Franklin: A Tribute to the Queen of Soul at the Proms – Friday, BBC Four, 8pm

Aretha Franklin, who passed away in 2018, was one of the greatest singers to ever grace our planet. 

I say that without the merest hint of hyperbole, her extraordinary voice hit you directly in the heart and solar plexus; an emotional and physical response to a human being expressing every last droplet of whatever they happened to be feeling deep down inside at the time. 

That uninhibited soul, the sheer magnitude of her ecstasy and anguish, was a once in a lifetime gift to us all. We were lucky to have her. 

This BBC Proms gala is fronted by the estimable American R&B singer and Quincy Jones protégé Shelea. Several notable special guests are guaranteed. R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Griff’s Canadian Adventure – Saturday 13th August, Channel 4

Ah, Griff. For people of a certain age, Griff Rhys Jones will forever be associated with Not the Nine O’ Clock News and Alas Smith and Jones. An ‘80s comedy titan. 

If the young people they have now are even vaguely aware of him at all, he’s just that cheerful chap who presents TV travelogues. I’m sure he couldn’t care less about that, he’s enjoying a lucrative semi-retirement while traveling around the world. Good luck to the man, I’d so the same in his shoes. 

Griff’s latest vehicle is wry, genial, eloquent business as usual. Beautiful Canadian scenery, nice Canadian people, a light sprinkling of Canadian facts and fancies – it fulfils its basic brief with aplomb.

Marriage – Sunday 14th August, BBC One

Stefan Golaszewski made his name with the cult sitcoms Him & Her and Mum. The latter is one of the best British TV shows of the last few years: a modest little masterpiece. 

Marriage is Golaszewski’s first foray into drama, although it still retains his penchant for subtle humour. It’s also his first hour-long piece of episodic television, and I must admit that the low-key pacing which worked so well in a half-hour sitcom struggles to sustain this running time. It sometimes drags. 

However, there’s still so much to savour. Sean Bean and Nicola Walker are typically authentic as a married couple with a nagging sadness at their outwardly comfortable core. Flaws and all, Marriage lingers and intrigues. It's quietly devastating.

 

RED ROSE + SKY HIGH CLUB + PORN KING: THE RISE & FALL OF RON JEREMY

This article was originally published in The Courier on 13th August 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Red Rose – Monday, BBC Three, 10pm

Picture, if you will, Black Mirror hijacked by Shane Meadows. That was my initial impression upon watching this intriguing horror yarn about teenage friends from Bolton who gradually become bewitched by a sinister app. 

Troubled protagonist Roch is the first to fall under Red Rose’s mysterious spell. When she answers its ostensibly benign ‘Yes or No’ questions, the app starts granting her wishes. Enter our old friend, the Faustian pact. This won’t end well. 

Red Rose takes its cue from the likes of Carrie et al. It’s a sympathetic study of teenage angst shot through a supernatural prism; a creep-show possessed of some substance. The entire series will be available on iPlayer after episode one goes out.

Disclosure: Locked in the Hospital – Monday, BBC One, 7pm

No one should be living in hospital without any hope of release. That’s supposed to be against the law. And yet so many people have been stuck there, behind closed doors, for decades.

BBC Scotland reporter Lucy Adams focuses on four young men who, despite having committed no crimes, are still locked in secure hospitals. She investigates the sad stories of people with autism and learning disabilities who should not be trapped within this system. Adams also speaks to the families of those patients, all of whom have struggled for years to bring their loved ones home. 

Ministers have stated that they’ll definitely be released by 2024 at the latest, but why has it taken so long?

Sky High Club – Monday, BBC Scotland, 10:30pm/Thursday, BBC Three, 8pm

Loganair, which has its main base in Glasgow, is the UK’s largest regional airline. In this breezy new series, we spend time with its young crewmembers. They’re a close-knit team who thrive on banter. A nice bunch of kids living the high-flying dream. 

Captain Robbie, who’s only 25, met his partner Kirsten at work. It’s a long distance relationship: she lives in Shetland, he’s based in Edinburgh. The sweet highlight of episode one is when they meet for the first time in weeks during a brief flight stopover. A chaste kiss is exchanged. 

We’re also introduced to cabin crewmembers Shannon and Karolina, best friends since primary school, and trainee Omar from Morocco. A nice little show.

Porn King: The Rise & Fall of Ron Jeremy – Monday and Tuesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Veteran porn star Ron Jeremy is currently facing 34 charges of rape and sexual assault. This two-part series features exclusive testimonies from some of the women and industry insiders who have accused him of being a serial abuser. His alleged crimes are legion. 

Jeremy became a star during the so-called ‘Golden Age’ of porn in the 1970s. The Boogie Nights era. This chubby little man with his ridiculous mane and thick moustache cultivated an image of himself as a smart, funny, likeable character; the world’s most unlikely sex symbol, a harmless figure of fun. That was his subterfuge, an entirely disingenuous act. 

He is currently in jail awaiting trial. His victims will be vindicated. 

Shetland – Wednesday, BBC One, 9pm

The case of missing Danny Cairns continues during Douglas Henshall’s valedictory tour of duty as the glowering yet sensitive D.I. Jimmy Perez. 

Last week’s instalment ended with the shocking discovery of a corpse in a suitcase. It wasn’t Danny’s corpse, so he could still be alive (yep, that’s right, I’m quite the amateur sleuth).

This show won’t be the same without Henshall. I wish it all the best, his replacement will no doubt be fine and good, but it’s not like when a Doctor regenerates. Doctor Who thrives on change and the differing personalities of its lead actors. We watch the likes of Shetland because we enjoy the comforting presence of a certain actor as they pretend to solve crimes.

Hotel Custody – Thursday, STV, 9pm

One of the UK’s busiest police custody centres is located in the economically deprived town of Grimsby. This new series observes its staff as they deal with various detainees. You may find yourselves discomfited by its jarring shifts in tone. 

I appreciate that the staff (all of whom come across as decent people) feel compelled to lighten the mood with jokes. That’s understandable. My problem with this series is the way in which it distastefully tries to present itself as a light-hearted workplace documentary with a supporting cast of people struggling with mental illness, drugs and alcohol. 

It provides zero insight into the root causes of these problems. There is no wider context, it’s nothing more than voyeurism.

Hobby Man – Friday, Channel 4, 8pm

In this new series, comedian, journalist and The Last Leg co-host Alex Brooker embarks upon an odyssey to discover new hobbies. It’s never too late to while away your time with another enjoyably pointless endeavour. 

Episode one involves a trip to Edinburgh, during which Brooker hooks up with fellow fun-seeker Scarlett Moffatt. They visit one of the world’s oldest chess clubs, dive headfirst into the world of home brewing, and then head up to Loch Leven for a bit of birdwatching. At the end of their eventful journey, Brooker and Moffatt trade thoughts on which new hobby they enjoyed the most. 

Yep, it’s just another sliver of throwaway Friday night fun from your friends at Channel 4.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Van der Valk – Sunday 7th August, STV

This may be a damning indictment of either A) my prowess as a television critic, or B) the unexceptional nature of 21^st Century Van der Valk, but whenever I happen upon this revival, the only point I feel compelled to make is: what on earth were they thinking with that bland Richard Clayderman-esque rearrangement of one of TV’s most rousing theme tunes? The Simon Park Orchestra must be trashing their trumpets in dismay. 

As for the show itself, well, it’s just another slickly mounted Sunday night ITV cop drama. Marc Warren is reliably watchable as the taciturn Dutch detective, but otherwise it’s indistinguishable from every other show of its ‘dark and gritty’ clue-sniffing ilk.  

Tom Daley: Illegal to Be Me – Tuesday 9th August, BBC One

In over half the countries competing at this year’s Commonwealth Games, being gay is illegal. LGBTQ+ people are often subject to harassment and violence from the authorities and vigilante gangs. 

World champion diver Tom Daley, who is gay, hosted this sobering documentary in which he met with athletes who have understandably lost all hope of their countries ever becoming more inclusive. Those encounters helped Daley to respectfully shape a manifesto of changes the Commonwealth Games could make to show its support for LGBTQ+ rights. 

Six Pride flags were flown at the opening ceremony, a positive symbol seen by over a billion people. These gestures matter, their accumulative effect is important. More global sporting events should follow suit.

SHETLAND + THE FRINGE, FAME AND ME + GOOD GRIEF WITH REVEREND RICHARD COLES

This article was originally published in The Courier on 6th August 2022.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Shetland – Wednesday, BBC One, 9pm

The latest series of this ruggedly atmospheric crime drama will be the last to star Douglas Henshall as D.I. Jimmy Perez, as the actor has decided to move on to pastures new. It’s not the end for Shetland, however; Henshall’s replacement will be announced in due course. My money’s on Paul Chuckle. 

Perez’s final batch of cases begins with a troubled young author of graphic novels who goes missing on the day of his book launch. Has he disappeared of his own volition, or are more sinister forces at play? Meanwhile, Perez makes a hesitant attempt to rekindle his stagnant love life. 

It’s a typically diverting piece of twist-strewn Celtic noir, packaged in a crate of prime red herring.

The Fringe, Fame and Me – Monday, BBC Scotland, 10pm

The Edinburgh Fringe celebrates its 75^th anniversary this year. As we all know, it’s been responsible for propelling hitherto unknown comedians, actors, directors and writers into the stratosphere or thereabouts. This documentary convenes with some of those eternally grateful artistes. 

Chief among them are Bill Bailey, Frankie Boyle, Eddie Izzard, Miriam Margolyes, Michael Palin and Phoebe Waller-Bridge, all of whom talk frankly about the giddy highs and terrible lows of performing at the Fringe when you’re a complete unknown. 

They’re the lucky ones, their self-evident talent won out, but spare a thought for all of those who tried and failed. Nothing is guaranteed in the mercurial world of showbiz. It’s a strange old gamble riddled with anxiety.

Good Grief with Reverend Richard Coles – Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

Coles' husband, David, passed away three years ago. They’d been in love and inseparable for 12 years. Coles is still struggling to process his loss. 

In this ruminative and ultimately positive documentary, he challenges the commonly held perception that grief unfolds through a series of linear stages. Nothing could be further from the truth, we all deal with bereavement in different ways. 

Coles doesn’t offer any pat answers, but he does provide some hopefully useful guidance by trying out various forms of psychophysical therapy. He surfs, boxes, skydives, attends a laughter yoga class and embarks upon a luxury ‘grief cruise’. 

These things aren’t for everyone, but Coles' point is this: embrace whatever works for you. Networks of support exist.

Cryptocurrency: Has the Bubble Burst? – Tuesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Well, has it? In an effort to find out, Ade Adepitan seeks counsel with people who have immersed themselves in the murky crypto world. 

Full disclosure: I have no idea how cryptocurrency works. I barely know what it is. Adepitan is no expert either, hence why he’s ideally qualified to host a documentary in which he tries to make sense of it all from a layperson’s perspective. 

His interviewees include a multimillionaire who believes cryptocurrency is the gold-plated future, a former city trader who regards it as a dangerous pyramid scheme, and a lawyer who highlights the risks of being scammed in this market. 

I think I’ll just stick with my bog-standard high street bank account.

Changing Rooms – Wednesday, Channel 4, 8pm

Series two of this lifestyle behemoth’s revival begins in sleepy Tunbridge Wells, where Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen and co are given free rein to dramatically transform the ‘non-functioning’ living rooms of two neighbouring couples. 

Lozza’s specialist guests this week are sustainable designer Micaela Sharp and retro queen Whinnie Williams. A riot of colour and chic design ensues. 

Changing Rooms Mark II works because it barely alters the format of the original iteration. It’s perhaps easy to forget that during its heyday, home makeover shows weren’t a ubiquitous presence in our TV schedules. It felt quite fresh and innovative. 

Obviously there’s no way of recapturing that novelty, but the spectacle of LLB doing his flamboyant thing is still quite entertaining.

George Clarke’s Old House, New Home – Thursday, Channel 4, 8pm

The ubiquitous Clarke returns – has he ever been away? – with a new vehicle in which he helps people to renovate ancient dwellings. As you’d expect, at the end of each episode they’re living the absolute dream in a space that was once occupied by laughing cavaliers and scrofulous land barons. The circle of life. 

In episode one, Clarke meets a couple who’ve splashed out on an 18^th century barn. He also spends time with a couple who just couldn’t resist purchasing a nine-bedroom Victorian pile of bricks. A fantabulous folly! 

Clarke is utterly harmless, a blandly benign presence. And that’s the fundamental problem: this contraption would be more entertaining if wryly sceptical Kevin McCloud was in charge.

Football Dreams: The Academy – Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm

This new series follows a group of eight to eighteen-year-olds as they compete for potential glory at a prestigious South East London football academy. 

Talented tyros full of raw potential, some of them might end up playing in the Premier League. Most of them, alas, will not. 

It’s a difficult watch at times. The coaching staff are great, they’re fully aware of how sensitive they have to be when dealing with children, but there’s just no getting away from the fact that some of these hope-filled trainees won’t be invited back to the academy. 

And that’s an awful lot to deal with for a kid with his heart set on one prize, and one prize only.