TV Column: LOSING IT: OUR MENTAL HEALTH EMERGENCY + DOCTOR WHO

This article was originally published in The Courier on 18th January 2020.

NEXT WEEK’S TV

DIAMOND DEALERS AND COCKNEY GEEZERS

Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

This knockabout documentary follows three East End likely lads who run an independent jewellers called – I kid you not – Trotters. Judd, Alex and Kallum, who’ve been best friends since school, sell top flight bling to a bustling parade of mostly working-class customers, and can proudly boast of having more Instagram followers than any other UK jeweller. But that’s not enough: they’re off to NYC to procure items that will truly put them on the map. The banterrific lads are quite likeable – yes, even the one who looks like Jim Davidson - and the programme doesn’t peer down its nose at them or their clientele. Nice. Although billed as a one-off, it feels like a pilot for a series.

CRAZY DELICIOUS

Tuesday, Channel 4, 8pm

When is a televised culinary contest not a televised culinary contest? Never, they’re basically all the same. This new one has a bash at being a bit different by basing itself in a studio-based grotto – a whimsical Garden of Eden – packed with foraged food and drink (e.g. a tree that dispenses prosecco). But apart from that, it’s a generic confection in which three skilled amateur cooks must impress an expert panel of ‘Gods’ – Heston Blumenthal among them. This week they’re tasked with creating an inventive strawberry-based dish and a game-changing take on the hot dog. If you enjoy watching people cook, bake, whisk and knead, then this entirely inoffensive show will doubtless provide a modicum of nourishment. 

LOSING IT: OUR MENTAL HEALTH EMERGENCY

Tuesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Powerful and timely, this programme visits the Nottinghamshire Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust to examine Britain’s growing need to care for people struggling with severe clinical depression and anxiety. We meet an eleven-year-old girl with suicidal ideation and a mentally ill woman who recently attempted to kill herself and her family. Meanwhile, exhausted loved ones and concerned staff open up about the complexities of looking after patients who wish to take their own lives. It’s heart-breaking, but it needs to be in order to highlight the absolutely vital importance of knowing that you’re not alone, of knowing that you can talk about your feelings without fear of judgement. Trained professionals are permanently on hand to help.

INSIDE THE CROWN: SECRETS OF THE ROYALS

Thursday, STV, 9pm

Not all their secrets, surely? An expose on that scale would bring the monarchy to its knees. Instead, this new series – which arrives with impeccable timing – assembles a gang of expertly toadying lickspittles to rake over the officially acceptable dramas behind the merry house of Windsor. It begins with a sweeping essay on the history of 20^th century Royals who struggled to balance their sovereign duties with matters of the heart. The familiar sagas of Liz and Phil, and Diana Queen of Hearts, duly ensue. Gossipy Royal history is colourful and interesting, of course it is, but we’ve heard it all before. Future generations will look back upon this epoch and wonder what the hell was wrong with us all.

LAST WEEK’S TV

DOCTOR WHO

Sunday 12th January, BBC One

The terminally bland Chris Chibnall’s second series as showrunner began quite well with his Spyfall romp, but episode three – written by Ed Hime - was an embarrassing mess. It wasted Laura Fraser in a thankless supporting role, the actors playing the elderly couple were appalling (“Mah Benni!” has haunted my brain ever since), the alien wigs and humanoid cat make-up looked weirdly cheap, the direction was substandard, the overstuffed script was incompetent. There was no tension, no momentum, no one or nothing to care about. Stuff happened, then it ended. The clumsily tacked-on environmental message – while entirely sound in and of itself – came across as a laughable attempt to add weight to the preceding 48 minutes of utterly incoherent storytelling. As usual, Jodie Whittaker did her best under the circumstances. I love Doctor Who, we’re joined at the hip, but this was a nadir.

LOUIS THEROUX: SELLING SEX

Sunday 12th January, BBC Two

Theroux’s morally conflicted face went into mild overdrive during this report on British women who legally sell sex for a living. He juggled nuggets of inadvertent self-parody – “With a moment to myself, I reflected on the strangeness of what was taking place” – with his usual eloquent compassion. The admirably candid participants were vulnerable victims of abuse who’d chosen this path for reasons far beyond financial pragmatism. Theroux didn’t judge or crassly psychoanalyse them, that’s not his style. Instead he presented yet another sensitive, stigma-challenging character study.