THREE MINUTES: A LENGTHENING | EVERYONE ELSE BURNS | HAPPY VALLEY

This article was originally published in The Courier on 21st January 2003. 

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Storyville – Three Minutes: A Lengthening – Tuesday, BBC Four, 10pm

On Thursday 4^th August 1938, photographer David Kurtz captured some informal silent film footage of the Jewish community based in the small Polish town of Nasielsk. Those haunting three minutes form the basis of this documentary. 

Nasielsk had 7,000 inhabitants in 1938, 3,000 of whom were Jewish. Fewer than a hundred of them survived the Holocaust. 

The only voices we hear throughout the film belong to narrator Helena Bonham Carter, Kurtz’s eloquent grandson, an actor quoting from contemporary accounts, and, remarkably, a survivor who grew up in Nasielsk before it was invaded by the Nazis. He’s able to put names to faces. 

This fragment of film brings ghosts back to life, it preserves their memories. They existed.

Robson Green’s Weekend Escapes – Monday to Friday, BBC Two, 6:30pm

In this cosy new series, Mr Affability visits various picturesque outdoor spots in the North East of England. He’s not alone, of course, each leg of his rural journey is enjoyed in the company of a celebrity chum. That’s how these shows must always operate. By law.

Guests this week include footballers Les Ferdinand and Jill Scott, actor Mark Benton and comedian Lost Voice Guy. However, in a shocking break from standard TV rules, he’s joined on Friday by members of his actual family. 

Weekend Escapes fulfils its unpretentious M.O. without any fuss. This is comfort viewing incarnate, an animated tapestry of pretty pictures populated by pleasant people indulging in mild banter. 

It’s winter, it’s freezing, it’ll do for now.

Everyone Else Burns – Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

Simon Bird stars in this new sitcom as the uptight patriarch of a puritanically religious family who believe the end times are a‐coming. They’ll be saved by the Rapture. 

I wasn’t impressed by the first two episodes, both of which go out on Monday. It’s fundamentally sympathetic towards the brainwashed followers of futile doomsday cults, that much is clear, but it falls short of its potential as a piece of character‐based social satire. 

The performances are fine, but the script is limp and obvious. Every attempted joke falls flat.

It’s frustrating, and I can’t help thinking how this bleak subject matter would be handled by Chris Morris, who once made a very funny, thoughtful film, Four Lions, about suicide bombers. 

Sort Your Life Out – Wednesday, BBC One, 9pm

The delightful Stacey Solomon has returned for another series of friendly life hacks. In episode one, we meet a family whose home is cluttered with unnecessary detritus. Solomon and co come to the rescue. 

Now, I’m instinctively suspicious of most programmes along these ‘life‐changing’ makeover lines, as they tend to judge people harshly. They sneer, poke, mock and belittle. But that’s not the Solomon way. 

It would appear that she actually gets to know these families, she engages sympathetically with the parents and children, so in the end you get the impression that everyone is genuinely satisfied. You’d hope so anyway. 

Such a misleadingly aggressive title, though. It sounds like something Dirty Den would bark at Angie.

My Kind of Town – Thursday, BBC Scotland, 8pm

I’m fully aware that this week’s column is preoccupied with travelogues, but I hope these outdoorsy recommendations provide you with some vicarious forms of escape from the January blues. 

If you haven’t seen this lovely little show before, it’s worth checking out. The latest episode finds Ian Hamilton and his guide dog Major exploring the Scottish Borders town of Hawick.

Iain Robertson Rambles – Thursday, BBC Scotland, 8:30pm

And the walks just keep on comin’. 

In this episode, the Scottish actor Iain Robertson concludes his epic 200 mile trek along The Hebdridean Way. He’s occasionally accompanied by a film crew, but for the most part it’s all filmed via Robertson’s light self‐affixed camera. We’re in the intimate presence of a ruminative man and his faithful dog friend, Mollie, both of them miles from anywhere while in the centre of something meaningful. 

As Robertson points out, communing with nature can do wonders for one’s mental health. 

Yes, there are some celebrity cameos ‐ actors Kevin McKidd and Alex Norton in this case ‐ but they enhance Robertson’s message: solitude and company exist in therapeutic tandem. 

Travel Man: 48 Hours in Salzburg – Friday, Channel 4, 8:30pm

Joe Lycett’s travelling companion this week is fellow comic Roisin Conaty. They are, as you’ve doubtless already gathered from the title, in the Austrian city of Salzburg. 

Food‐wise, they devour some schnitzel, strudel and Salzburg’s signature dark chocolate, marzipan and nougat sweet: Mozartkulgen, which translates into English as Mozart’s Balls. Salzburg’s most famous son would presumably see the funny side of that irreverent tribute. 

The Mozart theme continues during a visit to an imaginative art installation. Lycett and Conaty also check in to a luxury art‐filled hotel, visit a forest‐bathing workshop, and have the all‐singing time of their lives on Fraulein Maria’s Bicycle Tour, which takes in various locations from The Sound of Music.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Happy Valley – Sunday 15th January, BBC One

We’ve reached the halfway point of the final series of Sally Wainwright’s modern classic. I usually shy away from praise of that nature, as it tends to sound glib and excessive, but Happy Valley is a special case. 

The opening scene, in which Catherine and Clare confronted each other, was an acting and writing masterclass. No histrionics, just two people quietly dealing with a gamut of conflicted emotions. Wainwright understands how people actually communicate with each other.

As well as being a gripping thriller, Happy Valley is an empathetic meditation on physical and psychological abuse. Gas‐lighting narcissists cannot be reasoned with. We’re instinctively inclined to give people the benefit of the doubt, but those humane impulses are wasted on abusers. 

This Cultural Life: Ken Loach – Wednesday 18th January, BBC Four

For over fifty years, Ken Loach has been Britain’s foremost politically‐engaged left‐wing filmmaker. In the latest episode of this televised podcast, the great man sat down with journalist John Wilson to discuss some of his cultural touchstones. 

Formative memories included family visits to Blackpool where he enjoyed some of the great British comedians of the day, and the influence of 1960s Czech cinema on his exceptional body of work. Those films inspired him to capture “a life happening” on screen. 

Now aged 86, Loach remains a modest man driven by anger and compassion. With regards to his attitudes toward social injustice, this quote was key: “You can’t see it happen and be indifferent.”

JOE LYCETT vs DAVID BECKHAM: A GOT YOUR BACK CHRISTMAS SPECIAL | VIENNA BLOOD | STACEY SOLOMON'S CRAFTY CHRISTMAS

This article was originally published in The Courier on 10th December 2022. 

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Joe Lycett vs David Beckham: A Got Your Back Christmas Special – Thursday, Channel 4, 9pm

The comedian Joe Lycett is rightly renowned for his politically motivated stunts, all of which are dedicated to highlighting social injustice to varying degrees, but he made more headlines than ever before with his recent ultimatum to that supposed ambassador for LGBTQ+ rights, David Beckham. 

The superstar footballer accepted a multimillion pound sponsorship deal with the Qatar World Cup. Homosexuality is illegal in Qatar. Lycett promised to donate £10,000 to LGBTQ+ charities if Beckham pulled out of the deal. If not? He’d shred the money. 

This documentary follows Lycett as he makes a considered stand against bigotry and hypocrisy. His actions raised awareness of a vital human rights issue and angered/confounded all the right people. Mission accomplished.

The Disappearance of April Jones – Monday to Wednesday, Channel 4, 9pm

Ten years ago, five-year-old April Jones went missing from outside her home in a quiet Welsh market town. 

This three-part series chronicles Britain’s largest ever police search. It was made with the cooperation of April’s family, alongside their local community and constabulary, so please rest assured: this isn’t a prurient true-crime enterprise told from afar. It’s handled with care. 

Episode one focuses on the day April disappeared. The subsequent news coverage encouraged people from all over the UK to assist the police in their enquiries. 

It gradually transpired that this horrific crime was perpetrated, not by a random stranger, but by someone who lived in the town. The shock and despair is palpable.

Undercover: Sexual Harassment – The Truth – Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

In this documentary, reporter Ellie Flynn poses undercover as a drunk young woman separated from her friends during a fun night out in the centre of town. Her goal: to expose the heinous reality of sexual harassment against women in Britain today. 

Flynn also poses online as her eighteen-year-old self, to illustrate the torrent of graphic messages and images that women receive from predatory men. She eventually confronts them. Why are they doing this? Why do they think it’s acceptable? 

The programme also features candid testimonies from women whose lives have been utterly devastated by sexual harassment and abuse. Preview copies weren’t available, but this sounds like an important, urgent and disturbing piece of work.

Vienna Blood – Wednesday, BBC Two, 9pm

Adapted from the popular novels by clinical psychologist Frank Tarris, Vienna Blood is a fairly solid thriller set in early 20^th Century Vienna. Now in its third series, you may have caught it before. 

The latest batch of adventures begins with Freud apostle Max (Matthew Beard) and senior Detective Oskar (Jürgen Maurer) investigating the murder of a young seamstress. They end up mired in an unfamiliar world of luxury and glamour, beneath which – wouldn’t you know it? – lurks a seedy subculture of exploitation, violence and corruption. 

Beard and Maurer make for a watchable addition to TV’s never-ending pantheon of clue-sniffing duos. Their odd couple chemistry is quite pleasing, and the psychological sub-current adds a certain frisson.

Children of the Taliban – Wednesday, Channel 4, 11:05pm

Shoukria and Arezo are young girls growing up in Taliban-ruled Kabul. They both lost their fathers during the war in Afghanistan. They’re illustrative of the hundreds of thousands of Afghan children who have to work to support their families under a brutal totalitarian regime. 

This documentary examines their plight. It also introduces us to Abdullah and Ehsanullah, who are the sons of high-ranking Taliban members. They live in different worlds, and yet these boys and girls have certain things in common. 

Channel 4 receives a lot of stick, and quite right too, but I cannot fault its commitment to documentaries of this particular nature. It’s not all Naked Attraction, y’know. It does produce some work of actual value.

Stacey Solomon’s Crafty Christmas – Thursday, BBC One, 8pm

All good people agree that Stacey Solomon is a splendid human being. Why, she’s the nation’s sweetheart™. 

In this typically cheery spin-off from her regular Sort Your Life Out gig, Stacey and her hapless, harmless husband Joe Swash share various ingenious homemade ways of brightening up your festive season without having to spend much money. Their kids gets involved too. 

They upcycle some knackered old Christmas decorations, bake an inexpensive cake, and rustle up some personalised crackers. Stacey also transforms a neighbouring barn into a glittering Christmas party destination. 

I’m loath to recommend lifestyle programmes during these direly straitened times, but Stacey has her heart in exactly the right place: make no mistake, she’s the anti-Kirstie Allsopp.

Celebrity Gogglebox 2022 – Friday, Channel 4, 9pm

When Gogglebox first wriggled its way onto our screens in 2013, I instinctively took against it. People watching television and passing critical comment? That’s my job! Who the ever-loving heck do these people think they are?! 

Reader, I’m a fool. A judgemental kneejerk snob. I’ve grown fond of this format over the years, it’s a comforting presence. A fun distraction. So while I’m no devotee, I do enjoy catching up with it from time to time. 

This special edition compiles some of the highlights from 2022’s celebrity spin-off. Our sofa-bound guests include Bill Bailey, Joanna Lumley, Oti Mabuse, Fred Siriex, the aforementioned Stacey Solomon, and that bumbling Madchester comedy duo Shaun Ryder and Bez.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Trailblazers: A Rocky Mountain Road Trip – Monday 5th December, BBC Two

In the penultimate episode of this travelogue, Emily Atack, Melanie Brown and Ruby Wax continued to trek in the footsteps of Victorian explorer Isabella Bird. 

No one will ever mistake Trailblazers for a particularly in-depth enterprise, but that’s not the fault of the evidently sincere presenters. Within the standardised TV restrictions placed upon it, the series does manage to educate and entertain. 

One gets the impression, however, that lead guide Wax in particular would’ve made a different programme if left to her own devices. 

Still, she managed to cut through the light-hearted exterior to express some thoughtful critiques of the American Dream, and the sequence devoted to the appalling discrimination endured by generations of Native Americans was sensitively handled.

Agatha Christie: Lucy Worsley on the Mystery Queen – Friday 9th December, BBC Two

Worsley concluded her latest essay in typically engaging and ruminative style. 

I take issue (yes, actual issue) with those who blithely criticise Worsley for her alleged failings: she’s a whimsical populist, bleat the naysayers, she looks like she’s having far too much fun. History is a serious business. 

Well, anyone who’s ever bothered to watch her best work, and this series was a fine example, will be aware that her wry sense of humour operates in tandem with a rigorous devotion to subverting received wisdom. She’s irreverent, sincere, insightful and persuasive.

LUCY WORSLEY INVESTIGATES + TROY DEENEY: WHERE'S MY HISTORY? + INSIDE NO. 9

This article was originally published in The Courier on 21st May 2022. 

NEXT WEEK’S TV

Lucy Worsley Investigates – Tuesday, BBC Two, 9pm

Worsley’s latest series is a characteristically vivid and engaging odyssey in which she challenges the received wisdom surrounding “some of the most dramatic and brutal chapters in British history.” 

Episode one finds her poring over ancient accounts and recently unearthed clues about Britain’s 17^th century witch hunts. It’s an awfully bleak yet fascinating subject. Worsley breathes life into women who were tragically persecuted during an epoch poisoned by violently deranged religious fervour.  

Worsley’s essays are sometimes tinged with whimsical humour, a little bit of light to offset the shade, but she’s on deadly serious form here. There is no room for levity. It’s a disturbing cold case investigated with commendable care and rigour.

Troy Deeney: Where’s My History? – Monday, Channel 4, 10pm

The professional footballer Troy Deeney continues his dedicated stand against structural racism in this informative documentary. 

Education is key, that’s Deeney’s driving point. A more expansive account of black history needs to be embedded within the UK’s school curriculum. British children have to learn about a whole range of ethnic minority role models. A few well-meaning lessons devoted to the likes of Martin Luther King and Rosa Parks aren’t enough. That just won’t do. 

“Learning about the positive contributions black people have made to society will not only empower black pupils,” says Deeney, “but will help stamp out the vile racist abuse me, my family and people of colour as a whole are subjected to.”

Bake Off: The Professionals – Tuesday, Channel 4, 8pm

I don’t understand the appeal of these cake-based programmes, but to each their own. Enjoy what you like, just as long as no one gets hurt in the process. If this column has a message, it’s probably that. 

Anyway. You know the formulaic score: various patisserie artisans compete for Bake Off glory. In round one they have just three hours to create 36 strawberry frasiers. As soon as that challenge was announced I immediately envisioned several full-sized glazed effigies of the actor Kelsey Grammer. That’s because I’m inherently facile. The results don’t live up to my stupid imaginings. Life is a constant disappointment. 

Genuine plus point: the delightful Stacey Solomon is your new co-host.

State of the Union – Tuesday, BBC Two, 10pm

Series two of this anthology drama, which is written by Nick Hornby and directed by Stephen Frears, unfolds as before in snappy ten minute exchanges between a troubled married couple.

Ellen (Patricia Clarkson) and Scott (Brendan Gleeson) meet in a hipster New York coffee shop. It’s a fraught encounter. 

Clarkson and Gleeson are both fine actors, but Hornby’s screenplay is terribly mannered. His writing draws attention to itself in a self-congratulatory way. It makes the dialogue of that insufferable blowhard Aaron Sorkin sound like Shane Meadows at his rawest. Ellen and Scott never come across as real people, they’re just mouthpieces for Hornby’s sub-screwball waffle.

It’s a long ten minutes. Oh well. Other television programmes are available.

Inside No. 9 – Wednesday, BBC Two, 10pm

The best episode of this particular series thus far, ‘A Random Act of Kindness’ is a sad domestic drama that veers off in entirely unexpected directions. 

The excellent Jessica Hynes stars as Helen, a tired, lonely, middle-aged woman trapped in an unhappy relationship with her angry teenage son, Zach. One day, a small bird crashes into Zach’s bedroom window. 

The injured animal is rescued by Bob (Steve Pemberton), a kindly passing stranger with a peculiar linguistic quirk who gradually forms a friendship with Helen and Zach. Reece Shearsmith plays a significant supporting role, as do the laws of physics (that’ll make sense when you watch it). 

This is Inside No. 9 in primarily serious and poignant mode. It lingers.

Grayson’s Art Club: Queen’s Jubilee Special – Wednesday, Channel 4, 10pm

Now, you wouldn’t expect Grayson Perry to be much of a royalist. And you’d be right. But he’s fascinated by the monarchy and all the complex things it represents. The Queen in particular is an artist’s dream. Her image and the iconography that surrounds her can be used in all sorts of interesting ways. 

In this typically thoughtful edition of his Art Club, Perry and his wife Philippa invite talented amateur artists to create their own symbolic renderings of Her Majesty. “Whatever they might tell us about her,” says Perry, “might also tell us some revealing things about ourselves.” 

His celebrity guests are Harry Hill and Prue Leith, but as always the real stars are those creative members of the public.

PRU – Thursday, BBC Three, 10pm

This new sitcom follows a bunch of teenagers as they attempt to navigate their way through everyday life at a Pupil Referral Unit, otherwise known as a school for excluded kids. 

Series creators Alex Tenenbaum, Nathaniel Stevens and Teddy Nygh have created something here that’s clearly borne of research and experience. It’s a sympathetic piece of social commentary, albeit one that doesn’t draw self-conscious attention to its fundamentally serious themes. 

The young multicultural cast are entirely convincing, and the writing is quite sharp at times. Will you bust a gut laughing? Probably not. But PRU is a likeable show populated by intriguing characters, and the premise alone makes it worthy of consideration. It has some potential.

LAST WEEK’S TV

Conversations with Friends – Sunday 15th May, BBC Three

BBC Three’s adaptation of Sally Rooney’s Normal People was one of the best TV dramas of recent years. This adaptation of Rooney’s debut novel is brought to you by the same team. It will almost certainly repeat the success of their previous endeavour. 

The protagonist is Frances, a bright, shy, slightly awkward young woman who performs spoken-word poetry with her more extroverted best pal and ex-girlfriend Bobbi. Complications arise when the duo enter the orbit of a successful author. Frances falls for her handsome actor husband. Bobbi is attracted to his wife. 

As per Normal People, this is a perceptive and emotionally resonant piece of work in which everything rings true. It cuts deep.

Derry Girls – Tuesday 18th May and Wednesday 19th May 19, Channel 4

“There’s no answer to any of this, is there?” 

With that line spoken by Michelle, Lisa McGee pretty much summed up the underlying point of her justly lauded sitcom about Northern Irish teenage friends living through the final years of the Troubles. 

Her two-part farewell didn’t disappoint. Derry Girls was first and foremost a knockabout farce. The characters were daft and endearing. But McGee never lost sight of the sombre background details, even while she was making us laugh. She judged it all astutely. 

The final episode, which revolved around the signing of the Good Friday Agreement, brought her emotions to the fore in an entirely earned way. Sweet, silly and quietly profound; a perfect ending.